dirtydunlop

wat 2 say

Mon, 14 Jun 2004 23:10:50 GMT

its been ages since i did this. ok i've finished ma art folio and finished skool its a weird feeling. free but uncertain.
goin to college to do art.
went out with mum and dad today saw harry potter 3 was really good but i think they could have done the first bit better with the aunt and i think they struggled to fit everything in and if they struggled with this one i want to see how they will fit four into a movie.
goin on holiday on thursday quite exciting. getting legs and bikini wax done 2moro.kinda worried. im sure it'll be fine if it was as sore as they say then no one would get it done.
i gotta pack and get ready i got ma travellers cheaques today. i still hasnt hit me its all going over my head. i dont know when it will hit me maybe when my dad drops us off and im left. it will be fine i know excatly what to do ive done it twice every year of my life.
can't wait to get a good tan tho. im actually not bothered about going out at night, just wanna enjoy the sunshine.
can't wait...

mugh

Fri, 21 May 2004 22:11:05 GMT

worked from 12-3.45 then worked at childrens cottage @ 4-6.
went out wid steph to sum guys party down the pub exactly now a week ago. was really fun met all stephs town mates and mike...
on saturday steph said that he text her saying who was the pretty blonde that was with her. she said that i should b chuffed cuz girls usally run after him and he never runs after girls. so was quite chuffed and he is quite chuffed. ok so kinda bored with matt he's so far away and he doesn't text me or email me and when he does its just constant small talk and just a bit predictable.
went to art on.... umm can't remeber wat day exactly but guess who else was in there.. yes, thats right nick. so it was just me and him for the WHOLE DAY. it was ok tho, we chatted caught up. i asked questions... questions that ex's aren't 2 ask... lol. i asked how his love life was goin?, then if he knew matt Brown? oh yeah and if he fancied sarah-jane lol. agrh im such a bitch hehehehe! he said that he didnt really have a love lifa at the moment and didnt say much about sarah-jane. i think he was genuinely shocked that id asked. but it was actually really good for us it felt good.
watched some of the 6th year show dvd before friends. it's really good forgot how talented our year really was.
friends today made me laugh till my tummy was sore. how do they still do it? im gonna miss friends. gonna buy all the dvds.
gonna go 2 the cinema with steph 2moro mite see van helsing. dunno.

me myself and i

Sat, 08 May 2004 14:02:41 GMT

so college went ok he took a look and my work and was quite pleased. i got a verbal acceptance won't get the proper letter till 2 weeks. oh you know those 2 peices of work she wanted me to do that i spent hours over he just flicked passed them ahhh!
still i got and thats all that matters.
Wednesday is the last day at skool sooo scary! Mcgowen is being such a dick about it all.

english on friday.... ahhh scary, been printing of revision
notes.

ok get this im seeing matt without actually seeing him lol. how funny is that. found out thruogh my spy ian's mate ben. lol
ok ok im sad but u know wat im like i get very attached to relationships. it said so on the spark note quiz lol there really good if u haven't done them go 2 www.thespark.com and they do student note so u can pretend to study,lol.
matt hasn't replyed to my last email and hasn't txt me once again it looks like im gonna have to txt him. plus on the answer to the spark test it said i should go 4 good loverboys which is a good description of matt and u dont get many of them. he's soo sweet when he does txt or email me.

oh i found out why im gonna miss skool so much it's cuz only ppl at skool care about me... picture this
ok came in from town first thing mum asked was how it went, which was kool she gave me a ug and stuff. got to skool everyone asked how i did. i felt really nice. its nice to know that ppl care (THANK ALL!) even janice at work asked me how it went. however when i got in the car dad didnt ask me, got in the house dad didn't ask me. i had 2 hints i wasn't wearing skool uniform and i huge black folder. even when i got in the house dad didn't ask. mum said "have u told dad" i said that he hasn't asked he made me say he didn't at all seem interested and even kirsty didnt ask either. this is my family! but my friends seem more like family to me there so important to me. they care about me. im not speaking about mum she couldn't care more. im scared that when i leave im gonna lose my family of friends and by stuck with my dad not really caring. u guys mean alot to me. thanks for everything.

scary frogs!?!?!?

Thu, 06 May 2004 20:53:43 GMT

ok so college tomorow........................

quite nervous

got all my stuff together......... getting the bus tomorow morning

if i dont get in i'm gonna cry.......

i've done the grave yard pic in pencil and sea scene in oil pastel.

wat am i gonna do if i dont get in......if i cant get in there maybe im not cut out to do graphics or product design. i can't think about it, gotta b positive.....

love life:
matt emailed me back on monday being really sweet.

ouch

Sun, 02 May 2004 19:29:11 GMT

ok so college really wasnt fun. u actually need a portfolio to get into a portfolio course?!?! yeah i know! so she asked me and mog to do 2 A2 peices of work 1 inside 1 outside and location so fotos 4 next friday. i've done ma outside one of the graveyard in pencil. was down there the whole day the weather was gorgeous but got sunburnt really sux. i put aloe vera cream on it. its sorer 2day. but kinda got a tan too.
since i've been workin afta skool at childrens cottage every day i get soo nakerd and just fall asleep when i get home.
ok the deal on matt:
txt him last sunday but he was tired and said he'd speak to me 2moro but he didn't. i didn't hear from him 4 a week. ok so i got weak waiting 4 him so txt him asking if he got the email from brodie and not to open it (long story). he text me back being really sweet and he carried on txtin me all nite till he fell asleep then apolagised for not txtin back. which is really cute but the thing i dont get is WHY CAN'T HE TXT ME? ok ok i know hes really busy, head boy, rugby, pipeband don't laugh. i know that he's in demand but is one txt really too much to ask!? i was speaking to fred again about him and he said "go and fineds anudder boi" i could take his advice but i have totally fallen 4 matt and would feel like i was cheating on him. its really weird i've fallen 4 a good boy which is totally unlike me. i've got hes email address just sent him an email soo lets see when i get a reply....

i have an itchy eye

Sun, 25 Apr 2004 22:19:28 GMT

don't ask hay fever.
ok so now matts in edinburgh we can text and stuff but thats kinda it really. maybe i should go down and see him....... mmmmmm..... i dunno
goin to college with mog tomoro. talk to sum manie about the course. fun! get the day of skool. yay!
had english prelim on friday kinda sucked was the written one the one a hate. first essay was ok second one i paniced and wrote a heep of shit.
i better go otherwise when mog picks me up 2moro at 8 i will b asleep in th shower.lol. just about done that before.

its all good

Mon, 19 Apr 2004 21:08:05 GMT

went to the cinema with matt yesterday. went to pizza hut then cinema. we saw 50 first dates was really good. no awkward scilences we spoke about loadsa random i don't think he was too freaked out. after he foned his mum for a lift cuz she was in town got in the car and they asked if i wanted to go for drinks at chicetas. so i said sure we had a jug of margarita and nachos was really nice got on with them well. matt kept given me that i'm sorry look. after i asked if i passed the parent test. he said it wasnt a test and that he was more friends with them than they were his parents. when i got home he got out the car too guess he didnt wanna kiss me infront of the folks.lol. i asked him when am i gonna see u again and he said that he was going to school on wednesday (in edinburgh). i said that he should txt me and if hes up for the weekend to give me a call he agreed. i knew that he was going back down on wednesday but it only really hit me yesterday when he said he doesn't finish till july. it sucks were just getting to know each other and now he has to go away. when i was speaking to his mum she said i'd have to go down and see him. which seems like a good idea but travelling scares me cuz im hopeless at organising stuff so trains and buses are behond me. plus i've only seen him a few times i dunno if its too soon to b chasing him across scotland. i had a grin across my face that i haven't seen since glassel gig. hes soo sweet and just treated me like real nice. he paid for everything and was a perfect gentlemen. i really wasn't use to it. but dont worry i can get use to it.lol. he said his exgirlfriend owned a porche and a bettle yes thats rite NOT her parent actually hers. thats wat i was thining ahhhh! still im not gonna be something not.
so skool was much more easily digested today partly because i had a HUGE smile but also cus i found out that i didnt have to resit ma english close reading.wahoooooooooo!
so basically its been a thoughtful, happy, unbirthday day.

loved up

Tue, 13 Apr 2004 18:46:45 GMT

ok ..........so went to frankys even tho i hadn't quite got ova ma cold but was good. got drunk spoke to every1 and met matt again. i'd met him before from emily's party. he's friends with chrsitian they go shooting together. anyway got speak to him for a long time we really clicked.and at the end of the nite he kissed me on the cheek which was sweet. he said he was going to vickys so i was chuffed and said we would meet up then. so anyway vickys party was good again i felt kinda empty like everything was going on around me but i wasnt there. he didnt cum i txt him he said he did'nt know vicky or tim very well but he was going to brodies so i would see him then. brodies party was last nite. and i saw him we chatted danced kissed awwwww. he so nice. we're going to the cinema 2moro. can't wait.....he txt me 2day and i got a "hey hun" and a kiss. he stays in maryculter but goes to an all boys school down in edinburgh. he's head boy. he goes back at the end of the week. booooooo! think im gonna miss him. he use to robert gordons with nick. nick really gets under my skin i dunno why but he really irritates me i just wanna slap him and tell him to wise up.

i should do sum studying. i know i should but i get distracted so easily. i will try.

i got a letter back from the college saying that i gotta go in and talk about the course. i wanna week to just sleep, eat and think. why can't u just get a remote for ur life and put it on hold.

snuff snuff

Sun, 04 Apr 2004 16:57:41 GMT

i have a cold
my nose is wed
i cant bweath and feel sowwy for myself as it is a lovely sunny day.
but all is good cuz..............
I HAVE A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
yeah oh yeah!?!?! im ace. its a fiat punto. 4 doors 1.1 litre engine electric windies... ect
ok ok so i cant drive it yet but im gonna learn in it. lets face it i need all the practice i can get.
its the hols wowowowo lotsa partys to go to so im hopin i can get rid of this cold quickly.
friday was weird i felt very alone even tho i was surrounded by ppl. i went to bands nite for a very short time then went to the pub. got drunk went outside to get a taxi and "he" walked past to go in the stag. aaahhhhhh! i felt like running back in.
ok well im gonna go get a tissue cuz my nose is running...

sparkly

Wed, 31 Mar 2004 19:56:53 GMT

i was driving today. i have decided i don't like driving. it's the whole coordination thing. i knew i'd have a problem with ma coordination. my memory is also rubbish. i could tell he was getting frustrated telling me the same thing over and over again. he said that it takes practice. i couldn't wait to get out the car. when i get my own car i can practice driving more and be able to remember stuff. AHGSAAGGAAAAAHHHHHHH?!?!?!?
mmmmmmm
ah well this easter hols is gonna be sooooo much fun wid loadsa partys and stuff im usally flying away to sum where hot wid my family but i put ma foot down saying i need to revise. lol. theres vickys party, frankys party and Brodies thing. there will b endless nites to the pub its gonna b great.
felt sorry for franky 2day and her easter hunt she spent so much effort on it and didn't raise any money she got £2 but she spent more than that on the eggs.
count down to leaving skool its really scary. been at skool for nearly all my life and now we have to go. ok ok its just to a big skool called college uni ect... but still. i feel a bit pissed off. i finally feel that i've settled in school in year and now i have to leave. im gonna miss all the people that i talk to but dont really have any association with just the random chats with ppl in class and in the coffee bar. i mite not see those ppl every again. it would be nice to know how ppl got on.
gotta make new friends... mite be hard to ppl that dont know me cuz ppl that know me know wat im like but to people i just met i could be kinda weird. rite now i can act all crazy and nobody thinks anything of it because it me.
actually im doin an art thing its fine all art ppl r crazy rite?
my hotmail is messin up i keep having to make up a new password so if i haven't emailed back or sumthing then thats why.

Shopping!!!!!!!!

Sun, 28 Mar 2004 21:07:33 GMT

today was good fun. went shopping wid mog and pixie. bought an ace new jacket its kinda summery/spring. toatlly ace and sophisticated like. i wanna go in again. i'd forgotten how much i love shopping. got a top from AB10 a shirt ace purple poka dot bag and funky pants. we all got really well. saw jill in the f1 shop workin. it was so weird seeing her again she's totally changed matured alot. i saw sarah aswell in town she's changed got really mature and her hairs all different.
was at the pub last like half of our year. was good got quite drunk callum came in said high he left pretty early was wid emily most of the nite. heard some good news last nite. stayed at emily's felt a bit rough in the morning. we chatted loads was good. i've taught mum how to txt its really good. afta shopping came home and had a nap for an hour felt really good when woke was a good nap. i can cooked a fried breakie so that will be done on holiday. ok well think i should do something constructive.need to pee.

yawn!

Thu, 25 Mar 2004 18:53:32 GMT

I PASSED MY PERSONAL STUDY!!!!!!!! i'm so happy. finally i was so fed up with red pen. i gave her my reflective today no doubt im gonna get that back aswell. nearly finished my psychology project got a few things to do gonna hand it in 2moro.with psychology finished and personal study finished i can concentrate on ma art essays.
i was working on ma essay today in art and sonya kept coming ova thinking sumthing was wrong.
i felt very focused last nite got alot done. less stressed i think.
work at childrens cottage seems to go passed so quickly its kinda atomatic. there was a frog today outside the nursery was ace.
i wanna do sumting new with ma hair dunno wat tho different but realistic. any ideas tell me......
2moro's gonna b tiring skool, childrens cottage finish there at 6 then dudley's at 7. im always nakerd after that.
ok gotta go make t.

Wed, 24 Mar 2004 17:57:08 GMT

well today was ok till i had my driving lesson. i can't do lotsa things at once and if i slightly go to the left while changing gear he grabs the wheel.i got all stressed cuz hes all uptight. then i got a headache and sitting in the coffee bar didnt help. i got all bored. im like that i have to be doing something hate just sitting about. i started making those triangles outta crisp packets like ian. ended up doin psychology outta desperation. got home took some paracetamol and feel betta now. just doin ma reflective essay. if miss ridgewell give it back with more red pen im gonna scream.

mmmmm toffee yogurt

Mon, 22 Mar 2004 16:28:01 GMT

i did my personal study i finished but didnt have time to look over it so rpobibly had loadsa mistakes.
i went down the vill wid emily was really good had girlie chat. i bought choccie cake mmmmm.felt like a pie after i finished it tho. gotta do this careers thing 2nite at 6.30 oh its a hard life for a prefect. i only agreed to it cuz im a sucker for a hug lol.went to the woodend barn to see the gallery wid tim, vicky and chris but it was closed goin down 2moro at lunch. victim r such a sweet couple.

today.......

Sun, 21 Mar 2004 21:26:11 GMT

well today was the first time i waitressed at dudleys. i was really nervous cuz i hated waitressing at banchory lodge i blamed it on the crappy kilt and tights but no its just me. i'm soo forgetful. everyone was reallly stressed cuz we were full and only 1 cheif Graeme. i felt i was in the way. i wanted to help but they were too busy to ask. ah well i didn't break anything. wish that mog was there to keep me right.
mothers day got mum a teddy and stamp thing. she was chuffed.
mum bought love actually just watched it its so sweet all lovey dovey which actually made me feel shitty that i didnt have any1.
it made me think if sum1 asked me to marry them ova a restraunt full of customers and really spontaneous would i say yes just because of the moment. im a sucker 4 romance.
anyway gotta sort out ma personal study got it tomoro. ahhhhh! i really gotta pass it.miss ridgewell gave me it back. she said she didnt know if it would pass but "try it" wat the fuck?!?!?!
i gotta pass this damn thing and she says "try it"
ah well.....

alrite

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 19:52:12 GMT

ok so today was ummmmm ok. i'm soo happy that i've dropped maths a huge weight has been lifted. i've got my english personal study on monday so worried about that got it back today from miss ridgewell and she said that she can't decide if its a really good int2 or a pass. sooo pissed off she said "try it" i thought that was totally fucked up i need english.
anyway i've got this deep craving to drive again been moaning for a car but don't think it's gonna work.
love life is quite fucked up at the mo. i've got 1 guy on my mind all the time but i dunno why. i really need to get over it. i wish he was taken so i knew it wouldnt be a posibility.
i really wanna go to the pub on saturday. i ain't been for a while.
just had a chipper. last sex and the city later.......